2 intrepid BH3 Hashers
left Buffalo in a rented pimp-mobile
to join Hogtown, London (England), Pittsburgh and Flour City Hashers for an excellent weekend of Hashing.
Trail set off the front of Toronto's Division 52 Police Station. The Toronto Film Festival was in town and things were hopping on a warm Ontario evening. Much fun was had with the passing civilians as they gawked, took photos and generally shook their heads at this group of 20 odd half-minds.
After introductions and proper time to apply tattoos (oh yes, did I mention tattoos? I made introductions to
Wet 'n Dirty, Cougar, Sex Toy, Dr. Doolittle and Mount Me with the "On-On" tattoo and my...uh...tongue) we were on trail.
A quick jaunt around the police station and we were off. Checks, false trails and many cat-calls (at least that is what I choose to believe they were) led us to the classic and great University of Toronto campus. I checked my whistle as we were passing a soccer game - perhaps causing the game to come to a premature pause!
On On to the center of the paparazzi craziness at Bloor and Younge Streets.
Mount Me and I successfully convinced a group of tourists that we were George Clooney and Tyra Banks. The resemblance is amazing, don't you think?
Extremely dense urban hashing ensued. Trail was lost, found and lost again. At one point,
Moist Leatherette, Dr. Doolittle, Eager Beaver and I were seriously lost. We recovered only when we asked some patio dinners "Which way did the people in lingerie go?"
On On through Downtown Toronto. Sample comments (at least those in English) included....
"Nice legs"
"Can I touch your t!ts?"
"What are you doing?"
"You people are f*cked up"
About another 5k passed. Where the was the beer near? Where oh where?
We turned the corner and came into Chinatown. At last! Beer was near. A powerful thirst had been built up and was satisfied with the best Canada had to offer.
After a short break, we continued On-In. A restaurant was distinguished by the complete lack of spoken English (perhaps they did understand "The motherf*cker laid a sh!tty trail") and some very good Chinese food.
Down-downs included multiple punishments for the out-of-towners (
Dr. Doolittle - London,
Hypnotits - Pittsburgh,
Cherry Bomber - Flour City and us two BH3'ers). In Hogtown they drink their down-downs out of a stainless steel bedpan. Yeah. It's as awesome as it sounds!
Some more tattoos were applied, prompting
Hypnotits' friend (Just L) to look a bit aghast.
New Shoez tried to reassure her that "It wasn't always this bad". My reply to that was "Yeah. Often times it is much worse"
Awards were presented by the Hares. It may be immodest, but I will admit to winning "Best Dressed". Oh yeah. Red and slutty wins every time!
Beer and dinner ensued. Apparently in England, they've never had trouble working in Chicago, so
Dr. Doolittle got to hear a bit about that. We also heard quite a bit about America's Interhash in Mexico. Needless to say, it stoked enthusiasm about Colorado 2009.
Sex Toy, Cougar, Shoez, Back Door Buzz, Cherry Bomber, MMITM and myself returned to chez Cougar for a long On-After where much fun was had. The following morning, still in the Hashing mood, we visited
Wet N Dirty at her civilian job as a baker and continued to celebrate our Half-Mindness with great croissants and some scrambled eggs.
On On my friends!
Awesome!
