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I often wonder what it would be like to make it to states. I think most runners say "I wish I was more talented" or things like that.
Recently I saw some online interviews of elite runners, and they all seemed so happy to be at that level of competition.
I kind of feel like it is "too late" for me to be competetive, even in college in d3. Runners who go to states and win competetive races seem almost godlike, because I believe I won't ever make it to any states-level competition, where the top x% of runners my age race.
I think I'll never be "there" so I wonder what it is like to be "there". Is it much better than here, where I am as a runner? It seems like it is, but I tell myself that it isn't. I remember some of my near last place finishes in league and district meets that felt amazing.
What is it like to be a champion?
Why do we run, if we have no chance at all of being the best? To reach our limits, and to do the best with what we have? That doesn't really seem to be what is going to make me go out nearly every day this summer and endure so much pain. I'd do it if my team needed me, but chances are I'll barely affect any scores, if at all.
I'm not training to be the best. I'm not training for my team. So why am I training?
What difference does it make it my lifetime PR is one minute faster, if it isn't a record, or has no effect on anything? What difference does it make if I train hard or take it easy?
I guess, for now, it's just the undefinable spirit of running.
(The break after track probably is making me slightly crazy)
Being faster is harder and more stressful. Every race is an opportunity to lose and the pressure is high. It makes you more pessimistic. You have to work harder and harder to stay, not get better, but stay where you are. Improvements are small and seemingly pointless.
The Grass is always greener...
It's not always better. Yeah your faster, yeah you get more metals, yeah you get a fast PR.
There is a lot of pressure on you. If you are having a bad day/week/season they say that you didn't train enough. If you are kicking *** they say it is all natural talent.
You get sucked into this everend spiral of training. You train, you do well, you want to train more, your train a ton, you do better. You train even more, ect ect. Whatever you do there is going to be someone better at it you.
Why do you run?
I dunno. because you enjoy it.
I'm kind of in the same position as you, neverenough. It's the end of my track season as well (and high school!!!), so I'm taking a break, but anyway, I've definitely wondered some of the same things you have, like
"What difference does it make it my lifetime PR is one minute faster, if it isn't a record, or has no effect on anything? What difference does it make if I train hard or take it easy?"
I really can't say that I have an answer to your question. But maybe it helps to know that there are others in the same boat.
I do think, though, that if I just took it easy every day, I would get v. bored and lose interest in running. Maybe you can think of training hard not really just in that it can help you shave .000000001 seconds off your PR, but that it is something in itself
the sweat, the breathing hard, the knowledge that you challenged yourself. Perhaps I am being a bit cheesy, but I hope it helps anyway.<br />I'm trying to worry less about numbers, something that I have been focused on a loti.e. I have to help this many people, I have to win this many awards, and yes, I have to run this fast. But I think that when I do that, I am forgetting about the essence of what I am actually doing. It's one of those "journey over destination" type things.
Wow, I did not mean to type this much.
Anyway, hope this helps.
although im considered a top runner in my area, sometimes i kind of prefered the time before that big break, mainly because now my main goal is to defend my title and live up to my times, etc. i have bad days when everything hurts and i doubt my abilities to improve and get faster. actually ive been feeling this way since track ended. its hard for me to take time off because i feel like any time not spend on the roads, at the track, and on the hills is time im getting slower and someone else is getting faster. my heart and soul is in running and i hate feeling this anxiety. has anyone else had this dilema?
Crazy got it. You won't get much respect at the top from all those saying "it's all talent, I worked harder" in their Prefontainesque ways
There isn't much room to slack off, because everyone gets disappointed. Each little offset gets blown out of proportion, for me atleast. The joy of running leaves easier, and when it does, its much harder to get back.
Originally posted by charlieeee:
Crazy got it.
I'm not saying I don't have natural talent I'm just saying that it is a lot easier for people to find fault with you because, "oh he is so fast a little bit of advice will help you."
Then there is the fact that when you are good people think that you want to workout all the time and you are one sided and when you slack off they get pissed.
"Like you did as a child, take the quiet path, the scenic route. Pedal the back roads, slip through the neighborhoods. Suck in the sharp air.
Smell the trees...."
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I can't say i know what it's like to be amazing at running but I do know what it's like tobe really great at something (painting and drawing) and for everyone to just expect you to always do well and to be pressuring you, usually unintentionally, to continue to be great. It does get very old having depressed people say things like, " you're so good, I'll never be as good as you," or sometimes people will say how amazing you did, when you know you did well compared to some other people but you Know you can do much better. yeah, it's definitely good to be "gifted" or "skilled", but people are just never satisfied with what they have. Someones always got it better than they do. so many straight haired girls want curls and vise versa. That's just the way people are. There's always something that they don't have.