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Augie and others,
I want to pass along my condolences. I know everyone's situation is a little bit different, but I've been through losing both of my parents - my dad to cancer and my mom to what I would simply call old age. I ran regularly though both of these episodes and found that the 30 to 60 minutes a day outdoors with sunshine and fresh air really helped me cope during and after.
I want to wish you all the best.
I AM SO SORRY...I lost my grandmother to a brain tumor and she was very close to me. It is such a special feeling to have taken part in her care. I know your mom must have felt such comfort having you there. It is true the feeling never totally goes away but I never really want to forget it. It keeps me grounded in the everyday stuff.
Cancer sucks but I really think the "best" thing cancer gives us is the time you have left with each other. It gives you the opportunity to say goodbye and make your peace with it.
I hope you feel some comfort knowing all of these people are thinking of you and your family. My heart goes out to you. The joy in running will come back soon...take it easy and please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
To the rest of you...wow...there's some tough people here...it is sad yet inspiring to read your stories. I wish each of you happiness, memories and smiles...
I have had some exposure to pancreatic cancer, and I can only imagine what you have gone through over the past 10 months. I am so sorry for your loss.
Stress, IMO, can have a powerful negative impact on running. When I've tried to run during some very stressful times, those runs go extremely poorly.
I can relate! I went through a divorce 12 years ago. I lost my appetite and my desire to do almost everything. I ended up losing 15 pounds. The only things that kept me going were my two sons (one was only 6 years old at the time), and my running - which initially I had to force myself to keep doing. After a while, running 3 or 4 days a week saved my mental and physical health and got me feeling more positive about life. I guess there is something to those magical "endorphins" that they say runners feel after a good workout. Hang in there. It's hard to lose a parent, and grief can be crippling, both mentally and physically. You will work through this, just give yourself some time, and keep in touch with friends and family. They can be so much comfort at times like these.
That is true - I think cancer must be easier on the family in some ways, because you really do have time to prepare for the loss. I still have things I wish I'd said or done, wish I'd spent more time with her, whatever, but I can't imagine how amplified those feelings would be if we had lost her suddenly.
I am so thankful for running right now. As hard as it is, it really makes me feel much more in control, and much more normal. Running was the thing, when I started it, that got me back in control of my life several years ago and made me realize how much tougher I am than I thought I was. It's doing the same thing again for me now. And those endorphins sure don't hurt anything, either.
Augie -- my dad broke his hip in January, spent six weeks in ICU, and died on February 16. I spent many a night in the hospital and found that I just wasn't interested in spending my little bit of time away from work or hospital on running. I just needed to sit and think. (Maybe the fact that it was the middle of winter and the weather was so crappy had something to do with that).
In any event, within days after he died I got back out. I decided to basically start from scratch, having missed six weeks. However, over 4 months I worked back up to 50 mpw. I'm sure you'll find the same, and before long you'll get your enthusiasm back.
I find that I spend a lot of time on my runs thinking about my dad, so I've done nothing but nice easy runs.
With regard to the eating, I lost five pounds while he was in the hospital, even though I wasn't running, but gained that five plus another five back as soon as he died. That alone was pretty good motivation to get back running.
I realized early on that the first anniversary of his death would be the Austin marathon. So I decided right then to make that my goal. I'll have 6-7 months of base building for an 18 week program that I'll start next month. I've never tried a whole year training program, and I doubt I could now except for the significance of the weekend. My kids are scattered about Texas, and we'll gather together on that weekend. You might think about something similar.
Good luck to you and God bless you.
So sorry to hear about your loss. This is a really difficult time for you- no wonder you've lost some interest in running. My dad passed away suddenly a few months ago and it took at least 6-7 days before I could event think about running- and even longer- months- before I could stop bursting into tears during my runs (I sometimes still do)...
Again, take the time you need right now and I wish you all the best.
I am so sorry for your loss.
I have found, after almost a year of intense grief, that running was sometimes a time for me to cry. Alone. Those were some awful pace runs, but after them I usually felt cleansed.
My thoughts and prayers are with you as you go through this stage in life - be blessed.