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27536 Views 60 Replies Latest reply: Jul 24, 2012 8:36 PM by 300poundsandrunning RSS Go to original post 1 2 3 4 5 Previous Next
  • mrinertia Pro 1,310 posts since
    Dec 14, 2007

    I wouldn't worry about it. Assuming you run for you and not validation from another, other's opinions shouldn't carry so much weight. I don't think it has anything to do with being accepted or not, it's just people making assumptions which may or may not be that resonable. Ever see a short person and assume he's not a great basketball player? This is no different. Heavy runners are not that common for two reasons. Firstly, many people start a program but can't stick with it so you don't see them after a few races. Those that do stick with it generally shrink to a slimmer, faster state of being (that'll be you soon). Most of the bigger people I see at races are, in fact, walkers. Also, if those that are asking a bigger as well, there's a good chance they're insecure and just looking for someone in the same boat as them for comfort (just a guess on my part).

    When I do see heavier runners, I always wonder if they're gonna be in the portion that drops out or the portion that moves on to faster and slimmer.

    ----



    You run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking, racing around to come up behind you again.

  • antagonist77040 Rookie 47 posts since
    Nov 1, 2006

    This thread is the reason I have been opposed to this forum, I figured it wouldn't take long for the fat asses (like myself) to start crying about skinny runners.  It does nothing but to further segregate and draw 'lines in the sand.'  How long before the super obese are pointing fingers and whining about the plain ole' obese?

    As with everything else in life, who cares what others think, do the best you can, have fun and live life!! You only get one shot at it!

    And for what it's worth, I started running at 400lbs., have lost over 130 lbs. since with the help and support of the running community. And there have been many nay-sayers along the way, both small and big.



    [http://This message has been edited by antagonist77 (edited Jun-25-2007).|http://This message has been edited by antagonist77 (edited Jun-25-2007).]

  • goindownsouth Amateur 469 posts since
    Dec 14, 2007

    quote:


    Originally posted by antagonist77:

    This thread is the reason I have been opposed to this forum, I figured it wouldn't take long for the fat asses (like myself) to start crying about skinny runners.


     



    I think what you have read can be construed as crying, but I don't think that is what it is. What you have here is a group of people who are working hard to achieve their goals. Sure, the words may not always come out the "right way". But I think this forum is fantastic. Personally, I could care less about what other runners think of me, my running, what I am wearing, or whatever have you.

    I run for me, not for the pseudo validation of others.  Period.

  • GreenEggsAndHam Expert 312 posts since
    Jun 4, 2006

    quote:


    Originally posted by mrinertia:

    I wouldn't worry about it. Assuming you run for you and not validation from another, other's opinions shouldn't carry so much weight. I don't think it has anything to do with being accepted or not, it's just people making assumptions which may or may not be that resonable. Ever see a short person and assume he's not a great basketball player? This is no different. Heavy runners are not that common for two reasons. Firstly, many people start a program but can't stick with it so you don't see them after a few races. Those that do stick with it generally shrink to a slimmer, faster state of being (that'll be you soon). Most of the bigger people I see at races are, in fact, walkers. Also, if those that are asking a bigger as well, there's a good chance they're insecure and just looking for someone in the same boat as them for comfort (just a guess on my part).

    When I do see heavier runners, I always wonder if they're gonna be in the portion that drops out or the portion that moves on to faster and slimmer.


     




    I've been running for 8 years, hun... No slimmer!  What an assumption.

  • melistic Amateur 777 posts since
    Oct 11, 2007

    To play the devil's Advocate..
    Barbie says "it's not right to crack on me, just because I'm a skinny"

    You're looking at the skinny runner's differently right? Do they not have to train for endurance and speed just like you? Or is it the natural assumption, that just because I'm thinner I should be in shape, maybe I've just had a baby, maybe I've just lost 100 lbs., maybe I'm naturally skinny but have never been athletic.
    If you are going to make assumptions that Barbie will be faster than you; it's only natural for Barbie to think she can beat you too!
    When you cross the finish line first it's a victory for you, so does that make it a defeat for her, that she got 'beat' by someone heavier? What does that say? She must really be a loser if I beat her? You take away from her accomplishment, to make yourself feel better? (Generalizing, not saying YOU feel that way)
    The other big girl is happy to see someone of her size. So she asks if you're walking. Who does the walking Barbie look to for encouragement? They are out there running too, trying to get in better shape. Just like you. Who accepts you if you look in shape but struggle through a 5k?

    Now, I'm done playing devil's advocate.
    Your size has very little to do with your athletic ability. I get out raced by my 95 pound friend and my 240 lb. husband. It just takes some people awhile to realize that! Still doesn't mean I have to like it. Sure, I'll pick you out to beat..but then Green Eggs & Ham flies by as I'm sucking wind, so it goes around, comes around. I'm happy to get beat by any girl. it's the 10 year old boy that 1/2's my time that bothers me.

  • UltraRunner2B Rookie 24 posts since
    Sep 26, 2007

     

    Hi,

     

     

    I hope no one minds me dropping in from the trail running forum. 

     

     

    spicegeek, I'm just curious about what you makes you think the Barbies (and what's the deal with the label by the way?) you pass assume they're in better shape than you, and that they need humbling.  I'm no "Barbie", but I am a 30-something, 9:30-10:00 mile pace "skinny" and I get passed by C/A runners frequently.   I'm not humbled in the least, because I take it to mean I'm good, but they're better.

     

     

    I love competing against runners of all demographics, but nothing is more discouraging than knowing that someone is using you as a negative motivation for themselves.  The next time a C/A runner passes me, I hope they won't be thinking "beat that skinny b*$&h!"

     

     

    Thanks for letting me add my two cents.

     

     

  • swell Rookie 13 posts since
    Oct 15, 2007

     

    This is a good thread; a lot of angst coming out.  But the truth is you have to find your motivation internally.  If you measure yourself against someone else it says only that you beat or loss to that person on that day.  It says nothing about discipline, training or natural abililty. And, unless you are world class, there is always going to be someone in front of you.  An important point to remember is you run with the body you have.  Generally in the professional/world class ranks those athlete's have some genetic predisposition to excel at a certain sport.  Think about it, how often do you see a great athlete in one sport change to a different sport and do well.  Lance Armstrong was less than world class at the NY marathon.  Could you imagine one of the Kenyans taking up Football at the professional level?

     

     

    What I'm getting at is most of us C/A's are not predisposed to be speedsters.  We should take heart in the fact that we have the courage, in a very image based society, to get out and race when we know we won't have a decent chance at an award much less winning.  Its about something else entirely; its about finding something inside you.  You can't really be sure what others are thinking unless you talk to them.  What I find is most have an individual story and compulsion for running and most emphathize with the trials and tribulations of other runners.  I enjoy our local running group because I know the stories behind the runners and its heartening to cheer for people when you know what hurdles they are surmounting.

     

     

    Having said that, go out and run for yourself and don't let anyone take that from you.

     

     

  • BobbiOwens Rookie 2 posts since
    Jan 17, 2008

     

    On the flip side, I am 6'1 and 140 lbs. I get those looks from people when I run as if they are thinking, "Good grief! She doesn't "need" to run. She doesn't need to lose any weight."

     

     

    I wish people would just understand that most of us run for the "love" of running.

     

     

     

     

     

    Bobbi

     

     

  • PudgeyRunner Rookie 26 posts since
    Dec 14, 2007

    I've got to reply to this.  I'm a fairly large girl.  I'm fairly new to running (again but that's a different story).  I haven't even run a race yet and had never thought about the comments and thoughts from other runners when I get to my first one.  So far, from people on the street, all I've gotten was encouraging comments.  I don't know if other runners would look at me differently or not, but..what I did want to say was that it was another larger runner that really motivated me.  I was in class, and I heard another larger woman in my class, about my age (almost 30) and build talking to one of the very young, very thin girls.  The thinner person was asking the larger one dozens of questions about running and races.  The larger one seemed very animated and they both seemed friendly.  I thought, "heck, if she can do it, why couldn't I".  I hate to say I let myself talk myself out of running because of my weight.  I know now how silly that was, but I'm glad a woman like her came along to help knock it out of me.  Other than that, some skinny runners apparantly show respect, not because of our weight, just because we are good runners.

  • Runner Chick'en Pro 145 posts since
    Jan 24, 2008

     

    I have been there, I have had those same feelings but now I could care less   I am out there doing something that the majority of this country won't get off their butts to do!  I have worked darn hard to get to where I am and I am not going to let anyone take that away from me! 

     

     

  • csickels Rookie 100 posts since
    Oct 23, 2007

    The thread title in itself just screams paranoia. I'm going to blow your mind here people. What if those people who you think are "looking at you differently" aren't looking at you at all? That's the most likely answer to the question, since most people don't pay attention to others except when it is convenient and self-serving. The fact is, as a person who, for most of my life has been fairly thin, I will tell you that I do look at (truly) heavy people differently - with a ton of admiration (pardon the pun). I'm a guy, and if I weighed 275 lbs like the poster above, I question if I would have ever found the courage and motivation to begin running in the first place. Just to make a point, heavy people are not automatically unathletic. When I was in high school, the best athlete in my class by far was a chubby looking kid everybody called "Slim". He still holds school records in basketball and soccer 15 yrs later (i believe). Watch the NFL draft this weekend, several of the top 10 picks will be over 300lbs. Do you think NFL teams are throwing multi-million dollar per year contracts at non-athletes?

     

     

    Being overweight is difficult enough (I did go through a stage in life where I was pretty overweight), why make it even harder on yourself by worrying what other ppl think? Rejoice in the fact that you ARE a runner! Running is an awesome activity! What other hobby comes with a term like "runner's high" (other than doing drugs)? Don't let the percieved bullshit others may or may not be thinking negatively impact the pleasure you get from running.

  • wifor Rookie 5 posts since
    Apr 14, 2008

     

    Sometimes....most times people can't win.  When I was a 117 lb, 5'11 skinny, unattractive teenage boy, people would say .....gain some weight!  (But, I could run 16:30 5Ks!)  Now that I am a 44 year old man @ 240 running much slower, I am a fat old man!  I don't care....I run because I like it!  It has been 15 years since I trained for a half.  My goals for this year are to run 3 Halfs....each one faster than the other.  I ran my 1st at 2:22.  My goal for the 2nd is 2:11 and my 3rd if I am lucky...2:00.  It is improvement and np injuries I am looking for not fast times.  my 2 cents.

     

     

     

     

     

    Wifor

     

     





    Flying Pig 10K/ 1:03
    Geist 1/2 Marathon/ 2:22
    Do Run Run 15K/ 1:37
    Fort 4 Fitness 1/2 Marathon/ 2:20
    Indianapolis 1/2 Marathon/ 2:24

    Indianapolis Monumental 1/2 Marathon/ Goal: 2:19

  • FeelsSoGood2 Pro 107 posts since
    Feb 9, 2008

    I cannot imagine why people feel the need to judge ANYONE out there doing something good for themselves...but they do. I am experiencing pretty much the same thing because I am older. Basically I have no support. People keep telling me that people who run like me.... who may appear to be in great shape, drop dead of heart attacks from running and I should really 'watch' because of my age. They ignore the fact that I am in the best shape I have ever been in and that I run almost everyday and it's something that I take seriously and has become part of my lifestyle.  It has taken alot of dedication and hard work to do this. It's amazing as most of these coments come from those who continue to make excuses to not get out of their chairs to move! Where are they on a cold Saturday morning. Im at the park bundled up running against the cold blast of wind. I just registered for an 8K...and I have had some pretty negative responses. Mostly from my own family members!

     

    nice huh?





    ~continue to look ahead towards the goal and enjoy yourself getting closer~

  • SumoRunner Expert 36 posts since
    Aug 15, 2005

    Well first, there are a couple different aspects of this discussion. One for total strangers and another for close friends and family. You can choose your friends but you are stuck with family. On the other hand, strangers are of little consequence anyway.

     

    The vast majority of other runners either don't even notice you and don't care what you look like or how you run or they may even know where you're coming from and empathize completely. How or why they look at you or past you or through you shouldn't matter at all. They are not looking askance. They are simply looking. Their assumptions are based on a mental model of what a "proper" runner should look like and they mean no harm if some comment makes you feel uncomfortable. Those folks just lack a bit of tact is all.

     

    Now, there is a small subset in any sport, let's call them testosterone junkies, who are not merely competitive but openly combative. They look askance at everyone who is not in the top 5% of a race. Older runners, even if they can score well within their age groups are also the subject of scorn. They consider that to be a phoney race category. Only those on top of the game are given any respect. You can safely ignore these people. They will be taken down several notches sooner or later. In fact, I've noticed that they are the most likely to quit competing when their "skills" begin to diminsh.

     

    A much larger subset is welcoming and supportive. They are looking for friends, kindred spirits. Introduce yourself to any and all you meet at a road race. A few kinds words and not a defensive reply will diffuse any misunderstanding. After the race is done, compliment everyone on a good race whether it was or not and the next time you see them you'll have a friend in the crowd. They multiply this way.

     

    The real problem comes from those closest to us, at least in the beginning. If this is a new aspect of your life and not theirs, you're telling them you want to change from the person they are familiar with to someone else. There is some measure of fear that you will look down on them from the superior fitness perch. There is some measure of envy that you can now do what they can't when they know they should. There is the realization that you had the fortitude to do the hard work to acheive what you did and that if they tried to follow, they could fail where you succeeded. So they might want subconsciously to see you fail in order to asuage their feeling of inadequacy or make you feel in some way that what you have accomplished is not that important. To diminsh you is an attempt to retain the status of your past relationship.

     

    In time this will change. You just keep doing what you need to do for you and let them know, first that it doesn't change the relationship and second that their criticism is unfounded. And if their remarks are smarky and snide, let them know in a nice sort of way that it is unwelcome. It will stop. They will accept the new you. They may even follow.

  • monnsqueak Rookie 7 posts since
    Dec 8, 2008

     

    For the runners saying "I think about giving up" - don't! I'm a skinny little thing lurking on your board for advice for my partner, who is well overweight and on week 5 of c25k (he's so awesome!)... one of my friends who inspired me to start running is a big girl - and she's now passed the milestone of her first marathon. She's talked about getting a LOT of **** over what she eats and how much - and in  her words, if you're burning it, you can eat it

     

     

     

     

     

    Secondly, I also get a bunch of people yelling "you can do it", and "go for it" and "c'mon, not far to go" etc etc... I do think that this is something that some runners do, they're psyching themselves up as well as handing out encouragement and energy for everyone else. So I'd say keep going keep going keep going - and you're right: the last laugh is the one you have at the finish line as these other people stagger across after you

     

     

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