Was are the rules for coach conduct?
Is screaming from the sidelines over and over standard procedure.
Is yanking, and I do mean literally yanking a child off the field mid game acceptable behavior.
When opposing coaches and umpires request that a coach tone it down, is it time for this coach to call it a day.
Is having two or more 12 year olds brought to tears each game normal.
Unfortunately we see this kind of crap way too often. Almost worse than the coach pulling these kinds of antics are the fact that the parents sit back quietly and say nothing. And if the umpire is saying something to the coach, then in my experience he crossed the line a LONG, LONG time ago. We just agreed to "dismiss" two of our coaches this week for being too harsh and negative towards the girls. The sad part was that they have a TON of softball knowledge but they lack the ability to teach and relate to the girls. Knowledge and good intentions are not enough and are certainly no justification. Either lose the coach or find a new team! A coach that destructive can and will destroy kids that young!!
Every youth league has some kind of governing body, usually a Board of Directors. The FIRST time a coach gets out of line like that he/she needs to be given a heads-up about expected conduct. Let them know you are keeping an eye on them and further actions will have consequences. Then follow up SWIFTLY with penalties if it continues. We had a coach like that in our Little League and he was suspended for a season. He came back this year and has actually mellowed out. He's a good coach, but needs to know how to instill sportsmanship as well as fundamentals. Heck, what's the difference between the two?
"Many baseball fans look upon an umpire as a sort of necessary evil to the luxury of baseball, like the odor that follows an automobile." - Christie Mathewson
my son has played Travel Ball for 4 yrs. It is easy to stop poor coach conduct, but it takes TEAMWORK. MOMS & DADS & ALL PLAYERS need to walk out. Nothing is more important than the physical and emotional well being of your kid. I WAS dumb. When my son was 10 he pitched for a coach my husband knew for years. This jerk left my son on the mound walking 11 straight batters and I was too dumb to STOP it. My son was in tears on the mound. I thought it was just "tuffing it out" as my husband proclaimed. It was child abuse. MOMS..if it doesn't feel right to you..IT PROBABLY ISN'T RIGHT. Get your kid out of there. I have since done a lot of reading on the subject of youth sports and NOT ONE expert thinks a kid needs to be humiliated to make him a better athlete. My son has made three teams since then. Now I "interview" coaches before I let my son play. Part of that process is to let them know what I see as acceptable forms of motivation or discipline and what is not. It has made my son LOVE baseball again. And I did what all parents should do..I took care of my kid.
To cafemom, I hope you are not serious about the fact that you should have done something to stop this from happening. First, you would embarass your child to no end. Second, you have to be completely out of touch with reality to consider this type of behavior child abuse. Now, I was not there, but if you had a problem with this situation you could always talk to the coach AFTER the game. If you did not get the response that you desired, then I guess you could always find somewhere else for your child to play, if any other coach would agree to take YOU into their system.
After coaching for 15 plus years and being called every thing from a teddy bear to a wuss. I have found that the hardest thing for a coach to do is stay balanced. You must be tough enough to help the team with there faults and yet praise them for hteir good works. I imagine it is just as hard to not blow up at a player or parent as it is to not correct them when they are wrong. And last of all each player and parent react differently to your comments and deeds. So you as a coach must learn to read people well and make adjustments while keeping it as fair as posible. I ry to involve the parents in the coaching tasks so they know what we as coaches go through.
We had a horrible experience with my 13 yr old and her coach. Screaming derogatory comments, humiliating them in front of others, and also showing poor sportsmanship at games. Never owning anything. It was someone else's fault. I did speak up, and it slapped us hard in the face. In the end it was noted, but, still my kid was left feeling it was her fault. I don't know why parents feel compelled to let it go and ignore it, instead of stepping up. I guess playing was more important
There is sort of 2 different things going on about this post.
First is a coach too tough on his team, or is he down right stupid in the way he handles himself as a coach.
(A) Being tough on kids in the Right way only helps them better ball players and ready for the older years when they will be playing. Coaches have to be able to look at each player and see what they can take. All are different. Some need toughness for motivation, some can't handle it as well. Either way you have to be fair, compassionate, get on their tails sometimes, don't do the cussing thing and always teach sportsmanship, win or lose. I am tough as nails on our girls, which we started at 10u and I am fun with them. All of them respect that and my parents like it.
But you also have to remember coaching isn't easy, you have mom and dad and all the family sitting over the fence hollering at Susie to do this and do that and they all want to win, win, win. I don't allow this but it still happens and I have to call them down.That gets a coach started in a baad mood. I want to win and sometimes the game gets down right passionate and things get heated in the game, players make mistakes that you know they shouldn't and sometimes we hold our feelings and sometimes we forget and get on them too much.
(B) The fine line, practicing hard, making the work and get in shape and being strict is OK, getting on them abusively is another.
I have seen girls sneezed at and the would start to cry. If I saw one of my coaches or even if I jerks a girls or kid around, it would be the hiway and maybe more!
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