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13247 Views 127 Replies Latest reply: Aug 7, 2010 4:19 PM by dm5150 1 2 3 ... 9 Previous Next
alan2010 Amateur 12 posts since
Jun 21, 2010
Currently Being Moderated

Jun 25, 2010 11:27 AM

Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

                                                        LOST SPIRIT FOR THE GAME OF BASEBALL

I hope You will give me a little of your time.

My name is Mike. I believe Union City Little league Naugatuck CT. where my son has played baseball 8 years is taking the spirit of baseball from him. My son has been playing little league for his mom who died of Breast Cancer 4 years ago when he was 9.

My son is a very talented pitcher who has  beaten every team he has faced not only in our town league regular season, but also in the lower valley Shelton, Ansonia, Derby during fall ball. My son would pitched 3 great innings per game  showing the valley  Naugatuck had some great competition in the coming years . But my son has never been treated fairly when all-star time came .

Partly I believe was because of a dumb father (me) maybe getting over excited or maybe not knowing I may have said

something that was taken wrong which offended a few coaches who are the all-star coaches.


My son was asked to play on the 9/10 all-stars a few years ago But because the assistant coach called my son a derelict for a misplayed ball to right field during a game. I pulled my son from the team and filed a complaint and nothing was ever done ,except  followed my son in a negative way to this day. I knew something was wrong from the start because during practice on the 9/10 all-star team this same coach would make sure he hit bullets to my son in practice then stand there and say? couldn?t catch that one could you? and ?I don?t know what they see in you?. Don?t figure the position my son was trying ended up this coaches son?s position .

When I asked the 11/12 year old all-star coach this year why he didn?t pick my son I was given reasons that reflect personal feeling which judge character  Quote " I never felt a bond between me and your son when we played fall ball this past summer 09 He felt that was a disrespect. When I asked my son if this was true he told me ?the coach would yell a lot mostly at his own son but it left a negative impression on  my son so my son tried not to make too much eye contact with him. He also said when my son is asked to play another position he?s negative.

But Without team practice during regular my son couldn?t  learn a new position without game pressure. I don't blame him for being leery when asked to play some other position during a game. One or two weeks of practice before the season starts don?t cut it and because I?m disabled I can?t help the little guy too much and if fall ball was to be laidback my son was being evaluated.


My son?s regular season coach of the UCLL Yankees believed  he  was ready as his 12 year old choice for the 2010 11/12 all-stars but because a coach who is letting his personal feelings from last year and past all-star participation judge my son has kept him from being on the 11/12 year old all-star team this year and is keeping a good ball player from growing by playing better teams.

The Union City 11/12 year old all-stars has players on their roster who were benched for poor sportsmanship during regular season play because their team lost every game it played they would blame each other for the errors made also flinging helmets and bats returning to the dugout after being struck out . One of the boys told his coach he was hurt and couldn't play but was seen by the other all-star coach  playing basketball instead. but for what ever reason they over looked the poor sportsmanship attitudes and let them play on the 11/12 all-star .

The reasons given to me why  my son wasn't picked seem unjust when you look at how these other boys acted Btw one of those boys said nasty things about my son wearing his mom's head scarf thru the years.

My son was good enough to lead a very young 3rd place team to a championship game and lead his team in RBI?s and hitting should deserves a chance to play with a group of very talented 11/12 year olds.


My son has taken all his trophies and game balls put them neatly in a cardboard box and put them in storage .with tears in his eye looking up I heard him say sorry to his mom because he couldn't fulfill his promise he made. I see my son loosing his spirit for baseball. I?m unsure he even wants to play Babe- Ruth next year because the same group will be moving up and he feels he will never get a fair shake.

I would Love to see a little boy who has had a very tragic start in life get the respect he  deserves for his commitment  to Breast Cancer, baseball and most of all his mom get to play.


Leagues are full of good coaches but one has to admit their son would come before mine with a selfish  pick for an all-star team. Coaches shouldn't have the privilege to pick all-stars nor the board which is usually the coaches/volunteers.

Or shouldn?t be able to  judge a boy's character which gives the coaches a wide rang of  excuse when needed to justify a decision.

I can?t tell you how decisions  should be made  but  gross abuse happens every year with all-star picks and I?m sure in just about every little league some very talented little leaguer looses a chance to play because a coach?s selfishness or maybe he just don?t like the child or parent.

I want to thank Union City Little League in Naugatuck C.T. for breaking a young man?s spirit for the game of baseball and most of all a promise he made to his mom.


Can someone point me in the right direction



  • 2999hits Amateur 14 posts since
    Jan 16, 2008
    Currently Being Moderated
    1. Jun 25, 2010 12:02 PM (in response to alan2010)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    You quit on the team when your kid did make all stars.  You may view it as justified but most likely others don't.  Unless your kid was a stand out got to have stud pitcher I wouldn't choose him either.  Sorry, can't risk you quiting again when you don't view things as going your way. 


    All stars is about forming the best team and not neccesarily the best players.  12 kids that play together well will beat 12 kids that are better individuals than them but play as individuals most of the time.


    I'm sorry his mom passed away but that really has nothing to do with your issue.  If he's a player it will all sort itself out shortly when they hit the big field and stop playing for Dad.  Life isn't fair (sounds like he's experienced that) and he will only grow from this experience.  If he quits because of it he would have found another reason to quit eventually.



  • headinghome Pro 67 posts since
    May 27, 2009
    Currently Being Moderated
    2. Jun 25, 2010 1:15 PM (in response to 2999hits)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    Why if you say the coach called your kid a derelict, that coach exists in the league another minute during all stars is not surpirsing but ntl a shame. 


    The positive is this is another cruel lesson in life.


    I'm afraid your kid is marked, and proabbly never had a chance unless he lead the league in pitching strikouts and hitting homeruns this year.


    Talk to him about the decisions you guys have made, learn from them, even if everyting you did was correct, it still has an affect on the environment.


    Good luck, and take the all star season off and make time to find him a travel team that the coach is not a dad, or at least not a dad of the same position as your son plays.

  • Pete_Booth Pro 163 posts since
    May 25, 2007
    Currently Being Moderated
    3. Jun 25, 2010 1:31 PM (in response to headinghome)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    Sorry for your loss


    Partly I believe was because of a dumb father (me) maybe getting over excited or maybe not knowing I may have said
    something that was taken wrong which offended a few coaches who are the all-star coaches.

    But because the assistant coach called my son a derelict for a misplayed ball to right field during a game. I pulled my son from the team


    Take a "step back".  Sounds like with your wife gone you are now FULLY involved with your son and his activities.


    While this is a positive (shows your son you care) it can also be a negative.


    Also, I know the coach should NOT have called your son a derelict, but that is a kind word compared to what some of the coaches "back in the day" told me.


    Pulling your son didn't help matters any.


    FWIW: Today is a way more sensitive world then when I grew up. heck some schools banned Dodge ball. 


    As far as the rest of your OP. This falls under the category LL politics where you have "daddy" coaches and is a common theme.


    I agree with another poster. Get out of LL and look for travel ball opportunities if available in your area so that your son can get a "fresh" start.


    Pete Booth


  • vic2010 Amateur 25 posts since
    Aug 17, 2009
    Currently Being Moderated
    4. Jun 25, 2010 2:47 PM (in response to Pete_Booth)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    Find a new place to play. If your son loves baseball don't let bad coaches ruin the game for him. If his goal is to play high school ball lets say find the best path for him. Don't worry about All Stars-it really is not that important(my son has played every yr) but usually on teams with only 3/4 good players and the rest coaches kids who have no business on there. Practice with him all the time to help him get better. It will pay off in the long run.

  • THECOACH__44 Legend 289 posts since
    May 30, 2007
    Currently Being Moderated
    5. Jun 25, 2010 7:06 PM (in response to TG.)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball


    You brought it on him.


    Baseball is a game of failure and lessons in life. If he is losing his passion, it is on HIM. He can't concern himself with things he ca'tn control. But tomorrow he gets to play again.


    My son is a pro player. He has been a 3 time AS at AA and AAA but he hasn't been called up. He obviously is good. But someone else makes the call about who gets called up. He goes out and loves that he gets to play baseball today.


    He was 2-4 with a HR tonight. The MLB club has a player who is 0 for his last 20. THE KID should be up. WHAAAAA!!!

  • Chalkline Legend 476 posts since
    May 30, 2007
    Currently Being Moderated
    6. Jun 25, 2010 8:22 PM (in response to vic2010)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    !|alt=Image and video hosting by TinyPic|src=|border=0!


    "Can someone point me in the right direction?"


    Yes...but it might not be what you expected at the end?

  • Kyle_ Legend 554 posts since
    May 25, 2007
    Currently Being Moderated
    7. Jun 25, 2010 8:45 PM (in response to Chalkline)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    Can someone point me in the right direction?




    I'm siding with THE COACH here. This sport, unlike most others, is all about dealing with adversity and failure. How you both deal with this can set the tone for future success, in baseball and life.


    Move on, and find something positive from it.


    My son wasn't picked for the 11/12 All Star team, years ago. He was disappointed, but I told him he could mope, or go help coach the 9/10 team. He stepped up and helped the little guys, and when a kid came up lame on the 11/12 team, the manager noticed his positive attitude, and the whole team came over to invite him to fill the spot.


    So make your choices on how you react to these minor setbacks carefully. You make the choice on whether you glass is half full, or empty.


    Oh, and calling out the league is not cool. How would like it if someone from this league named you here, and told us the rest of the story? Stay tuned, it might happen.

  • 44Dodgers Pro 171 posts since
    May 11, 2009
    Currently Being Moderated
    8. Jun 25, 2010 8:48 PM (in response to THECOACH__44)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    Have to agree with 44.

    Many Condolences to the OP about the boys mum.


    At some point the parent needs to step back and let the child take over their own destiny.


    My own son plays on the big field 1st time soon, is he the best LL player I've seen? NO, is he the worst ?  NO.


    Can he become a better baseball player ? I'm sure he can if he wants to.


    He is a good athlete that loves baseball and other sports and the mateship it brings socially.

    It is purely Up to him what he does with baseball, not me as a Dad although I encourage his involvement in baseball and do what I can as a volunteer like many other parents.


    I've seen a couple of 14-15 yr Local Kids I know for a fact will get signed by a scout by the time they are 17-18 and many other kids that have loved the games since T-Ball that are good players but will never get signed.. That's life. Just enjoy the great game of baseball for what it is, just fun and a great game at any age to play.


    I'd say to the OP, let your boy just play and enjoy it, if you have Coaches that rag on him, move teams and move on.

  • Chalkline Legend 476 posts since
    May 30, 2007
    Currently Being Moderated
    9. Jun 25, 2010 9:11 PM (in response to 44Dodgers)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    !|alt=Image and video hosting by TinyPic|src=|border=0!


    "Have to agree with 44."


    Yes it's been a long week...good to see someone with some WHAAAAA! left in the tank  


  • Mike_CVUA Legend 590 posts since
    May 25, 2007
    Currently Being Moderated
    10. Jun 26, 2010 4:02 AM (in response to Kyle_)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    Coach, I am going to tell you a story of something that I personally witnessed.


    It was at a Majors District All-Star game.  I was the First Base Umpire. The HT pitcher was doing OK with a 5-0 lead, but when he gave up 2 runs in the 4th inning, the coach brought in a reliever.  The kid was naturally upset, but he went to the dugout as he was told.  Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball


    Between innings, I saw an obese woman getting into the face of her milquetoast, skinny husband.  Didn't know what it was all about until the next half inning break when this behemoth came over and yanked that kid out of the dugout and took him home.


    I pondered the following:  How would you feel if you were the first kid on the All Star list that was NOT taken?  And then this kid quits (or his mother quit for him), and you were never given a chance that maybe you really deserved because you would stick with it all the time?


    A commitment to All-Stars is enormous!  There are potentially Districts, States, Regions, and World Series.  That's a lot of games, travel, and time off that the parents must be willing to commit to.  I umpired in Europe where some teams from the far reaches of the world made such commitments to get to the Regionals in Poland, and their fans stayed with them, and none of them ever gave up even though there were teams that were clearly outclassed by the stronger national teams. (Some teams didn't have real baseball uniforms, but they played with zeal and had fun.  See Rule 1.0--Little League baseball is a GAME.)


    Is Little League for the young man?  Or is it all about you?


    Mike CVUA

    22-year Volunteer Umpire

  • FLCoachD Amateur 10 posts since
    Dec 3, 2001
    Currently Being Moderated
    11. Jun 26, 2010 9:33 AM (in response to Chalkline)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    Just wondering Mike. Why is it germaine that this kid's mother was an "obese behemoth?


    Was it really necessary to insult both parents while telling your story?

  • TG. Legend 814 posts since
    Jul 25, 2007
    Currently Being Moderated
    12. Jun 26, 2010 10:57 AM (in response to Mike_CVUA)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    What a long winded "whine and geez" party! You brought the problem on your son the first year. You made him a marked kid. You're a PITA parent. You're a PITA parent because you pulled him off the team. You're a PITA parent because you're busy making excuses rather than looking for solutions. Chances are your kid has an attitude about certain coaches you've developed in his mind.


    You need to get out of his way. YOU are his problem. If he wants to enjoy baseball there's still plenty of time assuming he has the skills to step it up on the full size field. Many kids don't. At least if he can't succeed on the full size field you already have the built in excuse in your mind. He got screwed in LL.


    No one except the player himself can take away his love for the game. A player either wants to play or he doesn't. Not every coach is a nice guy. I played for some real pricks. My son plays for a ***** in high school. But the day a coach runs a player out of the game you can be well assured that was the excuse the player used for lacking passion for the game.


    You only have to ask your son one question ... Is your passion for the game bigger than any coach's ability to run you out of the game?


    Note: Previous to the politically correct world, when I was nine in LL my coach used to call me a *****. He threw fastballs at my head in batting practice. He hit me several times in the ribs. I never found out if he was trying to toughen me up or run me out because he though he made a bad pick in the draft. I never told my parents. To me it was all about what I had to do to survive to become a baseball player. I made 11/12 all-stars at eveven. I played college baseball. Should I have quit at age nine because the coach didn't like me?  

  • TG. Legend 814 posts since
    Jul 25, 2007
    Currently Being Moderated
    14. Jun 26, 2010 11:15 AM (in response to Mike_CVUA)
    Re: Lost Spirit for the game of baseball

    I emailed UCLL with a link so we can get the other side of the story.

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